Slowing it down

Old post - written Sept 2016

Its been one of those weeks. For so many silly and legitimate reasons the runs didn't happen. What was supposed to be a 6 mile run and strides, 4 mile jog and 8 mile workout over three days ended up turning into two slow 4 mile jogs. It wasn't nothing, but it wasn't what was supposed to happen. I was solo parenting for part, hiking for my birthday for part, my street was SHUT DOWN and loaded up with COPS with guns and bulletproof vests (We were not involved personally but it was a wild day) and just overtired for part. One of those weeks. Other than running I kept my stuff together and had some really good moments in the week, the runs just didn't feel right and they just didnt get in. I still am figuring out why I have a little feeling of shame and guilt when runs don't happen. I'll blame it on all those years of coaches who were tough (but great coaches!). The reality is, it doesn't really matter that much if I don't get in a run or two.

(Birthday hike! Mt. Abe )

But heres the deal, in the past I would be like "F-This, I am done" and stop running for a week or two or three. Its the 'all or nothing' mentality that I am trying to recover from. So instead I emailed my coach, modified my week, then fell off the wagon anyways, and still feel okay about it. I am able to get my weekend runs in and I am moving on and starting fresh. I'm not trying to cram in the missing workout, I am just MOVING ON.

Life is full right now, I have been really into learning about living a slower, more simple life lately and it gives me lots of hope. I have been hooked on this podcast, The Slow Home Podcast. Its hard to put into words the mind shift I have had these past few weeks but I feel it in my gut. I have taken the need for bigger and better out of my life, less is more folks. De-cluttering drawers, toys, closets and basements. Working with these two mottos "If one does the job why do I need 2+?" and "Is there a need for this?"

Embracing moments like slow outside dinners with the kids, not thinking about what I 'should' do and just do the task at hand, staying off social media a bit more, running into a friend I hadn't seen in ages and just chatting, journaling, taking baths, taking stock of the things I really truly enjoy and maybe even saying no to outside activities and events. When I feel the stress of a rushed mind I take a second to shut it down and breathe. Slowing it down. It is seeping into everything and maybe into running a bit. My drive is a little less right now, mostly because my plate got a little too full.

But to bring it back full circle I know running is one of those keepers, one of those things I do really need and love in my life. One of the priorities. So I wont step away totally this time. I will just dial it down a bit, and maybe thats what my body wants anyways.

Loved this! From the @womankindmag on Instagram